Written by Mr. Mouseburger 14th May 2006
Kindly submitted by Pyro
After Judge Doom had experienced a rather embarrassing moment of slipping on a bunch of spilled balls, his weasel thugs (including his second-in-command Smart-Ass, who has Eddie at gunpoint) burst out laughing, which they seem prone to do whenever someone is hurt in a comical fashion. He warns them, as he has before, that they'll end up literally laughing themselves to death. Whether it's because they're 'evil' toons and thus merriment defies their existence or if such a thing is fatal to toons is unknown, but it gives Eddie an idea when the Judge leaves.
"Nothin's funny to you, ain't it Needle-Nose?" He asks Smart-Ass.
"Gotta problem with that?" The toon weasel responds as if ready to empty his revolver on him then and there.
"Nah, just wanna tell you something about the guy you're gonna dip!" Eddie says as he suddenly activates a large device of some kind that plays all the instruments required for a wacky musical tune all at once. Smart-Ass is at a complete loss of words at Eddie's curious action.
The normally humorless detective immediately proceeds to do something that is arguably one of the most memorable moments in the film, he goes all out on a variety of goofy antics as he improvises a song about Roger, ranging from making a rake handle hit himself in the face, tossing balls in the air and letting them fall on his head, to bouncing around on a pogo stick with a huge grin and smashing into a headlight.
Needless to say, his actions are too much for several of the weasels; Stupid keels over almost instantly and we see his soul exit his body. Wheezy follows shortly after (though not without some attempts to keep his soul from leaving). Smart-Ass however, who has a lot more self-control then his brothers, isn't quite as impressed.
"I'm sick of takin' falls, and bouncin' off the walls!" Eddie sings as he approaches the weasel."When I get done I'll have some fun and kick you in the--" but he's suddenly cut off by a falling vase to the head before he can get the last word or action out."Nose!" Roger shouts, attempting to provide Eddie with a rhyme. Smart-Ass makes the mistake of taking his eyes off Eddie long enough to correct Roger that nose does not rhyme with walls.
"No, but this does!" Eddie says as he gets back up and kicks the weasel leader in a spot that certainly DOES rhyme with walls. The impact is hard enough to send the weasel flying off his feet and into Doom's Dip machine's vat of paint thinner, killing him.