Written by Mr. Mouseburger 26th Jun 2007

Written by Mad Movie Mathew


Angel is having a few drinks with Danny when he sees Skinner talking to George at the bar.
"You know George Merchant, don't you?" asks Skinner.
"Hello, officer," George drunkenly slurs.
"Yes, we were just discussing the accident," Skinner tells Angel.
"I'd come to know Martin and Eve very well of late," mourns George. "Such a loss."
"Let's say we drink to their demise?" offers Skinner.
"Shouldn't that be 'drink to their memories'?" says a suspicious Angel.
"Of course. Cheers," Skinner smiles, raising a glass.
Going to the little boys' room George collapses off the bar onto the floor.
"I'm alright!" George assures.
"'Little' being the operative word," disdains Skinner. But as usual, Skinner suddenly turns darker, adding with a smirk, "oh, he'll be in pieces tomorrow!"
Skinner walks off. Angel follows him, but ends up slipping over and spilling his pints.
"Think someone needs to go home," laughs Inspector Frank.
"I'm not that drunk," assures Angel.
"Not you. Him," says Frank, looking over at George, relieving himself over the arcade machine.

Angel and Danny take George home, which turns out to be a very large mansion.
"Oh, good grief," moans Angel. "It's hardly in keeping with the village's rustic aesthetic, is it?"
They leave him at the front door, where the first thing Frank does is trip over going through the front door.
"I would not want to be him in the morning," giggles Angel, walking off, once again unaware of the caped figure behind him.

George takes a rather mis-aligned pee into the toilet, before picking up his beer. The caped killer is behind him and smacks him over the head with a machete.

The killer then drags him downstairs and places George's bloody corpse in a chair. The killer then places evidence to look like a fry-up gone wrong. As gas pours from the cooker, the killer places a candle by George's body. The resulting explosion destroys George's mansion.

As Angel investigates the scene the following morning, Skinner drives by in his car; the stereo pumping out the lyrics to the song 'Fire': "Fire to destroy all that you've done..."

Angel learns this was one of the killings by the Neighbourhood Watch Alliance, who obviously shared Angel's view.
"He had an awful house," explains Skinner.
"We begged him in vain to make his house more in keeping with the village's rustic aestheic," sighs Roy.