Written by Old Bluffer 2nd Jun 2005
The Emperor Ming's reign of terror over the oppressed peoples of Mongo is brought to a sudden end when his palace is ram-raided by War Rocket Ajax during his wedding ceremony to Dale Arden.
Ming belatedly sees the point of having a restricted guest list for his wedding.
The long spike protruding from Ajax impales him with an ooze of green blood and Flash advances upon the dying villain with a golden scimitar.
Ming is relegated to obskewerity.
Ming is suitably disgusted at being threatened by such an uncharismatic oaf - "Pathetic earthling, my life is not for you to give or take!" - and invokes his Ring of Power to vanish into the land of "Sequels That Never Were".
Special mention has to go to the most excellent sound effect of Ming's ring - someone definitely needs to make it into a mobilephone ringtone.
Having already been penetrated once, Ming doesn't want Flash's Golden Sword anywhere near his Ring.
if Ming The Merciless had lived the Moon would have came crashing down on Earth.
It still would have! Blessed just stopped the countdown. If Ming would have lived, he'd be married to someone named "Dale".
(Max Von Sod?!? I don't think so!)
I've just listened to the audio commentary by none other than Brian Blessed.
About Ming's death he recalls:
"I watched him die you know, on a Friday afternoon with all the dwarves sat around me behind the camera drinking tea and cakes, and watched him die with the rocket through his stomach - going "ooh dear, that must be painful", with all this green blood coming out - he could hardly keep his face straight. [...] God it was fun this film!"
Blessed's whole commentary is the most gushing and effusive I've ever heard, he literally loves every aspect of the movie, so he raves about everything and everyone that was involved in it. Hilariously though, the only complimentary things he can say about Sam Jones are that "He's so *pure* looking!" (he says this about 50 times) and "he's six foot three you know!".
At the end, when the Hawkmen form up to read: "Thanks Flash" Brian says :
"That brings tears to my eyes, the whole film is a masterpiece!"
I have to agree - thanks Vultan!
Did he spend the whole commentary SHOUTING as he does?