Written by Old Bluffer 26th Nov 2007
Written by Mr. Briggs Inc.
The Zenith of Dance of the Dwarfs (A.K.A. "Jungle Heat") has nothing to do with the titular monsters, nor does it have much else to do with the movie in any way despite being the best death scene. It begins when Harry Bediker, packing up his fuels and booze following a hellish run-in with a Dr. Evelyn Howard, who bitched and hounded him throughout the trip about Bediker's drinking and overall crudeness, is ambushed from behind by a pair of "Jay and Silent Bob" bandits. The former of whom, although obviously a fairly dirty man himself, still feels the need to comment about Harry's drinking habits, telling him that he at least "takes a little water in his".
"Fresh out of water, amigo, how about a little mazola oil?" Harry decides to quip back at the possible expense of his smart mouth being blown to bits. What he gets is a quick compliment about his cojones and a pistol-whack to the ground.
Despite the respect Bandit 1 obviously has for Peter Fonda's cojones, he still threatens our hero saying that maybe he'll blow them off! Understandably, Harry Bediker does not wish for his cojones to be blown off, and instead offers the bandits a share of his precious rum or mazola oil. Bandit 1 coldly declines Harry's pleas telling him to screw his mazola "I -*Ptooie*- spit on your mother's mazola!"Harry is reasonably shocked by the thug's crude refusal, and himself insists that they wouldn't be so tough if they didn't have their guns. Bandit 1 decides to prove him wrong, rolling up his sleeves and prepares for fisticuffs. Harry, seeing he is just as doomed as before, quickly changes his mind about the guns and instead asks the bandits if they've ever played "Cuban Roulette". When he mentions that "Feedel" himself invented it, and that it requires "*big* cojones", the first bandit becomes morbidly curious and asks how you play. The answer is best stated as: "basically the same as Russian Roulette except you use two bullets instead of one".
Before he takes his turn, Bandit 1's cojones go limp, he suggests that his hostage go first. Harry accepts, putting the revolver to his head, Bandit 2, who is perfectly happy with Mr. Bediker's alcohol, drunkenly laughing to the side.
Harry is hesitant to fire, so he instead takes a slight precaution, first pointing the gun safely at it's owner before swiftly pulling the trigger. Thankfully, this precaution pays off as we see the bandit's gut gets blown out, that could have been Harry's head!
"You lose(!)", Harry happily exclaims before asking Bandit 2 if he wants to play. Bandit 2, forgetting he has a shotgun to play with, flees into the woods where he ends up killing himself anyway. As Mr. Bediker states "I guess they don't make cojones like they used to!"
I guess this has a point, showing that Harry is smarter when not totally hammered and keeping him grounded for a while until Evelyn herself gets inebriated and has to call him for help. Of course, he was drinking a bit before the conflict, and Evelyn could have still radioed Bediker in the sky. Really the only point to the whole confrontation was an excuse to put more action into the largely uneventful film.