Written by Mr. Mouseburger 4th Nov 2006

Kindly submitted by Pyro

Back out in the world again, the master vampire "Drake", has decided to take a stroll about New York to get better acquainted with the current status of the world his vampire brethren have been living in during his centuries-long hibernation.

As night falls, a store catches Drake's eye, and unsurprisingly, it's a Goth novelty shop. It's primary wares include vampire-themed items of many shapes and sizes, and a pair of cynical, generation-x, Goth teens that run it.

Drake, suffice to say, appears to be somewhat put off by what popular culture has turned vampires into. He's even more put off by the fact that popular culture has reduced *him* to children’s lunch boxes, sex toys, beverages, and flatulent dolls.

Drake registers his complaint about the store's vampire-offensive theme by tossing the male shopkeeper out of the window (and across the street), before turning his attention to the Goth girl. Holding her down to a reclining chair, Drake tilts the girl's head back and, as she flails about helplessly, he finishes the deed by sinking his fangs into her neck, drinking her blood until she finally collapses lifelessly into the chair.